XDuds
by Brakish Rogue31
Summary: FINISHED!! See the X-Men like you've never seen them before, without powers (ooh!) See their new 'evolution' and the adventures in their recruit to the institute. What happens when Xavier doesn't care about his students & turns the institute into evil?
1. Prologue

Summary: See the X-Men like you've never seen them before. Without powers…but what the hell would we write about then?? Behold, the new…not improved X-Men!!  
  
Authors: Brakish & Rogue31  
  
Disclaimer: We do not own any of the X-Men Evolution characters. I know, as shocking as that my seem, well I tell ya it's all politics!…Damn politics! Oh geez, what am I talking about?!?! (blush)   
  
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****Special note MUST read***  
  
For those that do not understand what is going on…The X-Men do not have mutant powers. They have other problems, illness if you will. So Xavier is a money hungry man and he recruits the 'X-Men'. He talks like the Institute is a wonderful place but it's not. The recruits parents are giving him money to take care of the students. And Xavier is EVIL. He's not like the usual dull, boring, 'peace and harmony' Xavier you're used to.   
  
The X-Men's illnesses  
  
Scott- blind, rambling, idiot.  
Jean- obsessive compulsive to the extreme.  
Ororo- claustrophobic to the extreme.  
Logan- psychopathic.  
Kurt- There's a term for it but I'm not searching the web for it so…Kurt freaks out whenever anyone looks at him.  
  
Do us a favor and try not to think to hard while reading this. This is one of those fics. where it's off the wall and stupid. Trying to think will definitely confuse you so on with the story.  
  
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Without further ado…  
  
  
X-DUDS  
  
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Prologue  
  
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"Searching... searching... ... searching..."   
Xavier narrowed his eyes. Sweat trickled down his neck.   
  
"Having any luck, Professor?" Scott asked as he walked in the room, bumping into a nearby desk.   
  
"Careful Scott! Now go away! I need to concentrate," Xavier demanded.   
Scott left, but not without bumping into another obstacle.   
  
"Searching...again..."   
He had been searching for god knows how long.   
  
"Found."   
  
His eyes opened. Found? It was a miracle! "Pinpoint, Cerebro."   
  
"Name: Kurt Wagner. "   
  
"Excellent. Any more?"   
  
"Name: Katharine Pryde. Rogue. Evan Daniels. Lance-"   
  
He smiled. "No, no! That's quite a handful for now!" Ororo walked in. "Professor, were you successful?"   
  
"In fact, I was. Help me retrieve these children and take them here."   
She nodded.   
  
In the X-Jet they were, Xavier piloting. Scott sitting behind Xavier, rambling to himself. While Jean sat next to Xavier. "Professor. You're arms aren't in the correct 45 degree angle apart from the other," she said, showing him how to hold the wheel, 'correctly'. After a moments thought Xavier stopped the X-Jet in the air and made a sharp turn back to the mansion.   
  
"I forgot to lock you two up," the Professor said, once they were inside the hanger room. "No! No! We'll be good." Jean and Scott pleaded together. He looked at both of them. "Do I need to get the little sock man out?" he asked, reaching into his pocket. "Ahhh!" they both screamed, scrambling out of their seats. Xavier put the sock puppet on his hand and started chasing them. "No one can escape the sock puppet," he said, imitating a child's voice. The chase continued until Jean and Scott locked themselves into their holding cells.   
  
"Now, you two be good or I'll have Mr. Logan come baby-sit you," he said. As if on cue Logan started hollering from his cell in the basement. "See I'm being good," Jean said sitting in a corner. Thud, "I'm, I'm" thud, Scott fell to the ground. "I'm being good," he said. "Okay, I'll be back later. And remember, if you're bad you know what'll happen to you?" Xavier asked. "Not the sock puppet!" Jean shrieked. "Yes, the sock puppet. Now behave yourselves," Xavier said, and headed back to the X-Jet.   
  
Now, in the X-Jet they were, Xavier piloting. Ororo sat in the corner shivering. He looked back after the second take off. "Storm... are you all right?" She jumped   
  
"Quiet, Professor! You're wasting the air!" he rose an eyebrow. "Ororo, not now." She huddled closer to her lovely corner. She began to whimper softly to herself. Xavier shrugged and continued navigating the jet. Fist stop: Kurt Wagner.  
  
  
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The beginning of the recruits…  
  
Well!?!? Review, review, review. What did you think??? MORE??  
  
  
Chapter 1: The Kurt Encounter 


	2. Chapter 1: The Kurt Encounter

Summary: See the X-Men like you've never seen them before. Without powers…but what the hell would we write about then?? Behold, the new…not improved X-Men!!  
  
Authors: Brakish & Rogue31  
  
Disclaimer: X-Men Evolution characters are not our. Do not own. Not ours. No! We do own a tank of helium though. He-he. Except it's empty! Damn! It's all sucked up killing our brain cells. Eeeek!!   
  
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X-Duds  
  
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CHAPTER 1: The Kurt Encounter   
  
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Germany. A nice comfortable place with friendly people.  
  
"Kurt, honey... come down for breakfast."   
  
"Ja."   
  
The blue-haired boy walked down the stairs, avoiding the eyes of the room. He sat at the table and began eating the well-balanced breakfast his mother left for him. He could feel the eyes on him. The eyes like little hands. Little grubby hands. He jumped out of his chair.   
  
"STOP IT!"   
His father blinked and stepped towards the door. "Darling... he's doing it again..."   
  
The mother sighed. "We're sorry, Kurt... We'll wait outside."   
  
The boy nodded and finished his breakfast. His eyes glared towards the stare of the cat on the windowsill. He screamed. "GET AWAY CAT!"   
  
The cat hissed angrily and scampered out the door.   
  
  
  
Xavier sighed. "Finally! We arrived!"   
  
Ororo whimpered. "OPEN THE GODDAMN DOOR!!!!"   
  
The bald one blinked and did as she said. Ororo ran outside, taking deep breaths. "THANK THE GODDESS!"   
  
Xavier sighed. "Now... where does this Kurt Wagner live? It can't be too far away..."   
  
"This is it! I had it with this boy! We can't live like this!"   
  
"Honey, I know its hard but-"   
  
"No way! Whenever he goes in one room, we have to leave! I've had it!"   
  
Xavier smiled. "Sounds like our man." He wheeled his way to the two adults.   
  
"Excuse me... do you have a son?"   
  
The mother nodded furiously. "Yes... Kurt. He's inside right now."   
  
Xavier was pleased and wheeled inside the house. Kurt looked up from his plates and screamed loudly. "W-Who are you??!!"   
  
The old man smiled. "I am Professor Xavier I-"   
  
"LOOK AWAY!"   
  
He blinked. "What?"   
  
"STOP LOOKING AT ME!"   
  
"Kurt, let me-"   
  
"LOOK AWAY!!!!"   
  
He did so. "Well... Kurt... I wanted to speak to you about my Institute. It's for gifted children."   
  
Kurt blinked. "So... ... you'll get people to stop looking at me?"   
  
Xavier snickered a little but stopped. "Oh... err... yes."   
  
"All right! Let's go!"  
  
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Thoughts, concerns, questions? Well we can't help you there. You're just gonna have to read and PLEASE review. It's not like I'm asking for a hand out!?!   
  
Next chapter: The Continued Kurt Encounter 


	3. Chapter 2: The Continued Kurt Encounter

Summary: See the X-Men like you've never seen them before. Without powers…but what the hell would we write about then?? Behold, the new…not improved X-Men!!  
  
Authors: Brakish & Rogue31  
  
Disclaimer: X-characters not ours. Just barrowing em'. We'll give them back I promise, well I might but Brakish…no we're both being stingy their ours. HA HA HA. (Sarcasm…hint hint)  
  
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^  
  
****Special note MUST read***  
  
For those that do not understand what is going on…The X-Men do not have mutant powers. They have other problems, illness if you will. So Xavier is a money hungry man and he recruits the 'X-Men'. He talks like the Institute is a wonderful place but it's not. The recruits parents are giving him money to take care of the students. And Xavier is EVIL. He's not like the usual dull, boring, 'peace and harmony' Xavier you're used to.   
  
The X-Men's illnesses  
  
Scott- blind, rambling, idiot.  
Jean- obsessive compulsive to the extreme.  
Ororo- claustrophobic to the extreme.  
Logan- psychopathic.  
Kurt- There's a term for it but I'm not searching the web for it so…Kurt freaks out whenever anyone looks at him.  
  
Do us a favor and try not to think to hard while reading this. This is one of those fics. where it's off the wall and stupid. Trying to think will definitely confuse you so on with the story.  
  
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Okay enough of the babbling.  
  
  
X-DUDS  
  
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Chapter 3 The Continued Kurt Encounter  
  
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Professor Xavier exchanged handshakes with Kurt's parents as they graciously thanked him for taking their adopted son from them. Kurt's father pulled a bag out from the closet nearest to the door.   
  
"What's that?" Xavier asked, looking from the bag to the man that held it.  
  
"It's Kurt's clothing and personal belongings. I've been waiting for this day for a very long time. You don't know how much this means to me….us," he said, taking a quick glance around. "Thanks again. I'll send you some money to help pay for Kurt," he said.  
  
"No," Xavier started holding up his hands, "no, that won't be necessary."  
  
"But I insist," Kurt's father declared.  
  
"W…e...l...l, if you're sure," Xavier said, holding back a grin. "Come along Kurt it's time to meet your new home."  
  
Kurt leaped for joy, though making sure no one was looking at him. Once he was inside the X-Jet Storm was immediately at Xavier's side.  
  
"Professor, the air, another person will be wasting the precious air inside. I'll…we'll all suffocate…and…and."   
  
Before she could finish Xavier patted her on the arm and said, "There, there. It will be all right. There is plenty of air for all of us."  
  
At first a sort of suspicious looked covered Storm's face, then she smiled, adoring the attention he was giving her. "If you say so, Professor." Then slowly boarded the Blackbird.   
  
"Wow. You sure know how to help people with problems don't you," Kurt's mother praised.  
  
Xavier smiled warmly, "Well I have four students at my institute and I love helping them cope with their problems. It's the most rewarding thing for me to reach out and help someone so unfortunate."  
  
The three said their goodbyes and went their ways.  
  
  
Once Xavier had taken off he started hearing Kurt talk. "Stop…stop it. Stop, stop looking at me," Kurt demanded.  
  
Xavier put the auto-pilot on and went to Kurt's side to see what was the matter. "What is it Kurt? Who's looking at you," Xavier asked, making sure he wasn't looking at Kurt.  
  
Kurt pointed and Xavier turned his head to look. There he saw Kurt's reflection.  
  
"STOP! I said stop looking at me," Kurt screamed, and started hitting the window and it's reflection.   
  
Xavier sighed and went back to the controls when he heard Storm begin to speak.  
  
"Wasting…wasting the air," she said, huddled in the corner staring at Kurt as he screamed and continuously hit the window.  
  
Charles looked from one student to the other and flipped open a latch. Beneath it was a red button that said around it, 'I am annoyed'. He pushed the button and the Blackbird soared at extremely high speeds as it reached the mansion in less then a minute.  
  
He landed the Blackbird, then began to reach into his pocket. Ororo saw this and screamed, running out of the X-Jet. "Not the sock puppet!" Storm screamed.  
  
Kurt sat there wide eyed not sure what the sock puppet was or what he should do.   
  
"Shall we get you settled into your new home," Xavier said, an evil smile crept   
across his face.  
  
  
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Ooooooookay. Next chap up soon.   
  
  
Chapter 4: The Kitty Encounter  
  
Kitty- Sudden yelling or screaming that makes no sense. 


	4. Chapter 3: The Kitty Encounter

See the X-Men like you've never seen them before, without powers (ooh!) See their new 'evolution' and the adventures in their recruit to the institute. What happens when Xavier doesn't care about his students and turns the institute into a evil institute?  
  
Authors: Brakish & Rogue31  
  
Disclaimer: Not ours…at all!   
  
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Kitty- Sudden yelling or screaming that makes no sense.  
  
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X-DUDS  
  
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Chapter 4: The Kitty Encounter  
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"Rise and shine, children! Come on down for breakfast!" Xavier spoke from   
the loud intercoms. The doors opened, security cameras watching their every   
move.   
  
The patients left their cells towards the kitchen, Jean having to lead   
the way for Scott again. Kurt waited in his cell quietly until everyone   
passed on. Unfortunately, Kurt was visited by an unwanted visitor.  
  
Logan looked in the cell and sniffed around. Kurt yelped. Maybe the man   
would move on and not see him. Logan quietly moved his eyes to Kurt. Kurt   
screamed in fear. "STOP LOOKING AT ME! GO AWAY!!!"  
  
Logan growled low in his throat and attacked. Ororo walked down the hall   
hearing screaming and growling. She looked in Kurt's cell and sighed. "He's   
doing it again, Professor!"  
  
Xavier wheeled in with a cattle prod and zapped Logan gently on the side.   
The wild man keeled over and Kurt remained yelling. Xavier looked at Ororo.   
  
"Will you make sure Logan stays in the basement? Who let him out anyway?"  
  
Ororo blinked. "YOU did... I think... and I'm NOT staying here! It's... ...   
closed... and... ... and... AND!!!" She began breathing fast.   
  
Charles sighed. "Go to the kitchen."  
  
Finally Kurt arrived at the kitchen. Jean looked over and smiled. "Hello!"  
Kurt screamed and ran off. She blinked questionably. Scott rose an eyebrow. "What was THAT?"  
  
Jean stood up and walked to the corner of the room, peering to the hall.   
  
Kurt yelled. "NO! NO! STOP IT!"  
  
Jean frowned. "You're yelling incorrectly. You have to take a deep breath   
and take it all out at once forming words! Not quick small breaths!"  
  
"Jean!"  
  
She coward towards the wall, meeting eyes with the Professor.  
  
"What did I say about being good?"  
  
She blinked.  
  
Out came the sock puppet. Jean yelped and ran back to the table. Xavier   
moved his back towards Kurt. "You can come to the kitchen now, Kurt."  
  
He shook his head.  
  
The Professor was tempted on looking back. "Kuuuurt..."  
  
"They'll look at me!"  
  
The Professor shook his head heavily. He looked at Jean. "Don't look at Kurt   
or..." He flashed the sock puppet quickly. Jean nodded in fear. Eventually,   
  
Kurt came.   
  
Kurt took a seat at the table across from Scott. He could feel Scott's glance gazing at him. His eyes widened. "Ah!" Kurt screamed, jumping from his chair.   
  
All eyes peered at him in surprise. "AH! The eyes. Everyone's looking at me! The eyes. YOU!" he stopped pointing at Scott. "Yes, you! You're judging me. With...with your eyes. I can feel the judgment processing through your little mind. And...and you're asking yourself all these questions about me! You're thinking of me, aren't you!" Kurt demanded, hiding behind a counter, peeking over at Scott as he waited for an answer.   
  
Scott started stuttering as he shook out of fear. "I...I,I,I...I can't take this!" Scott screamed and ran out of the room. But not without tripping over several pieces of furniture.   
  
"Ororo, do you mind?" Xavier asked looking at her. Without an answer she quickly got up and left the room, not wanting to see what Xavier was about to do to Kurt.   
  
"Now Kurt, you see Scott is blind. Therefore he cannot see you," Xavier explained, not looking at Kurt.   
  
"NO! He can. He can see me," Kurt said, still hiding.  
  
"Well, I guess I'm left with no other choice but to," he began, slipping his hand into his jacket pocket pulling out a pair of pink sunglasses, "give you this."  
  
Kurt peek over the counter. "What is it?" he asked, curious.  
  
"They're a special pair of glasses. When you put them on you become invisible and no one can see you," Xavier said, handing the sunglasses to Kurt.  
  
"But those are my sunglasses, Professor," Jean began, giving a puppy dog look as Kurt took her favorite pair of sunglasses.  
  
"Oh now, Jean I know you want to use the 'invisible sunglasses', but then that wouldn't be sharing now would it," Xavier said, as he gave Jean a 'the sock puppet is in my pocket' look and she immediately stopped talking.  
  
"Go ahead Kurt, put them on," Xavier encouraged.  
  
Kurt put the sunglasses on and looked around.  
  
"Kurt where did you go. Oh no what happened to Kurt," Xavier said, looking around the room, holding back a grin.  
  
"I'm right here, Professor," Kurt said, waving his hands.  
  
"I can't see you, Kurt," Xavier said.  
  
"But Professor, he's right in," before Jean could finish, Xavier kicked her beneath the table.  
  
"Wow Professor. Thank you," Kurt said and sat down for breakfast.  
  
They had a... semi-peaceful breakfast. After eating: the search   
for Kitty Pryde.  
  
  
A scream was heard from outside the house and the neighboring kids stared.   
"Yeah... She cracked."  
  
A young girl ran out of the house. "Did you see that?!"  
  
The kids blinked in confusement. "What are you talking about?"  
  
"The mouse!"  
  
The kids sighed in relief. "Oh... a mouse?"  
  
"Yeah! A mouse with tiger claws and sabretooth teeth and!!! AND!!!" She   
looked at one of the children and screamed. "OH MY GOD THERE IT IS!!!!" She   
ran in the house. The boys looked at one another. "So... anyway..."  
  
Charles roared up the engine. The Blackbird was up and going and they landed   
in a near town. Once again, Ororo accompanied him... not quite willingly   
however. Xavier wheeled out of the jet and to the front door of the Pryde   
residence. He knocked gently and waited. No answer. He rose an eyebrow and   
tried again. Another quiet moment. He frowned. "I guess they're not home."  
  
He shook the door knob. The door slowly opened. To his surprised a girl was   
right there, watching the door. He smiled nervously. "Uh... Hello! I'm   
looking for a Miss Kitty Pryde."  
  
The girl smiled. "Oh, I'm her!" She jumped up with energy. "Can I get you   
anything?"  
  
He blinked. "How long were you there watching...?"  
  
She smiled. "An hour. So, Mr..."  
  
"Xavier."  
  
"Xavier! Would you like something to drink?"  
  
He rubbed his neck. "A glass of water would be good..."  
  
"Ok!" She ran to the kitchen. He looked around. No... she seemed to be the   
only one home at the moment... and she seemed normal. She couldn't be the   
Kitty Pryde he was looking for, could she?  
  
The burnet soon reappeared with a glass of water, soon handing it to the man   
in the wheelchair. She sat down and smiled sweetly. "So... what are you   
doing here, Mr. Xavier?"  
  
"Well... ... I came to invite you to my special school... but I see that   
you're-"  
  
"Shh!"  
  
He stopped talking. "What?"  
  
She leaned closer, her eyes widened. It was quiet for a good amount of time   
and soon her screaming broke the silence. Xavier jumped. "Miss Pryde! What's   
the matter?!"  
  
"LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THAT ONE!!!!"  
  
"... Miss Pryde?"  
  
She screamed and looked at the Professor. "Get down!" She pounced on the   
man. Nothing happened. Xavier grunted. "Miss Pryde, what is going on?"  
  
She sat up. "Phew! That was a close one!"  
  
"Um... what was that?"  
  
"The pink polar bear, duh! It's been out to get me since I was three, don't   
you know."  
  
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The next installment might be awhile so be patient.   
  
Next Chapter: The Evan Encounter  
  
Evan: Imaginary friends. 


	5. Chapter 4: The Evan Encounter

You know the summary. You know we don't own these characters, except for the obvious ones we made up. Behold. Another adventure.  
  
Authors: Brakish & Rogue31  
  
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X-Duds  
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Chapter 5: The Evan Encounter  
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Such a perfect day. The sun was out, the skies were clear, the breeze was…breezy, and all the neighborhood children were out playing in the streets. All except the other boy.   
  
Yes, the other boy. The other boy who never spoke to anyone except his mother, father, and his 'friends'. No one ever saw his alleged friends that he seemed to spend so much time with, all anyone ever heard was Evan Daniels talking to, basically, no one and many times he seemed to be playing with his 'friends', as if they were real.   
  
But what are we talking about now? Of course he didn't have any real friends, no one liked him. As his parents would tell terrified neighbors that would pass by and see Evan talking and having a good old time with his 'friends' that Evan just had a great imagination.   
  
Many neighbors told his parents it would be best if the boy was sent to a 'special' school that would meet his 'special needs'. But his parents would hear nothing of it. The neighbors would simply have to deal with the humiliation of the neighborhood until someone would come along and take the…odd child away…far away.  
  
  
Evan raced down the stairs and headed out the front door. "Bye mom, bye dad," he said, as he began opening the door.  
  
"Now just hold on a second there, Evan. Where are you going?" asked his father.  
  
"I'm going out with my friends, Billy, Bob, and Joe," stepping out onto the porch.  
  
"And just who are Billy, Bob, and Joe?" his mother asked.  
  
"They're my friends. You've met them remember," he turned his attention to outside and yelled, "I'll be right there."  
  
"Um…who are you talking to, son?" his father asked, looking out the window, seeing no one.  
  
"Geez dad, you're such a kidder. Billy's right there," Evan said, pointing to…well no one.  
  
His father rose an eyebrow. "I see."  
  
"Well, bye," Evan began to walk down the steps.  
  
"Evan wait just a minute. We need to talk," his mother demanded.  
  
"All right," Evan mumbled, "I'll be out soon. Just wait for me," he told the empty yard.  
  
Evan sat on the couch. His mother and father sat next to him. "Now Evan, the friends you hang around with are just, well they're just not real. You have such a wonderful imagination but I am worried about you. And everyone in the neighborhood is worried that you seemed to be a strange young boy. They don't understand why you never play with the other children and always talk to…nobody it seems," his mother said, hugging him.  
  
"But my friends are real. I try to play with the other kids it's just…they won't get along with my friends," Evan stated.  
  
"Your mother and I have been thinking and we think that we should send you to a school where you can make new friends," his father said.  
  
"What school is that?" Evan asked.  
  
"It's called," before his mother could answer their doorbell rang.  
  
  
"Well Ororo, this is the third youngster on the list. Maybe we'll get lucky and he's an easy case," Xavier said, pushing the doorbell.  
  
"Air becoming fainter…can't breathe," she said, looking around the neighborhood. She suddenly clutched Xavier's wheelchair. "The air! It's fading…fading," she finished and ran off down the road screaming.  
  
Xavier pulled out a little device from his pocket and pushed the button. An electrical shock was heard and Ororo cried out in pain.   
  
"Always forgets about her electric dog collar," Xavier muttered to himself with a smile.  
  
Just then the door opened. "Is this where Evan Daniels lives?" Xavier asked.  
  
The man before him nodded. Xavier smiled and wheeled inside.  
  
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next chapter the continued saga of the evan encounter.  
  
sorry for the short fic. school/college/lack of inspiration deprives you from writing a lot and at in a short amount of time.   
  
we love the reviews and ideas and may consider them if we want this to go super long.  
  
be PATIENT next chapter should be up shortly.   
  
hugs and sloppy kisses:  
Rogue31  
  
oh yeah, Brakish says 'hi' 


	6. Chapter 5: The Continued Saga of the Eva...

The Summary: Wait! You already know this! If not then…then you haven't been reading our writer's ramblings before every story. What is the matter with you?! You should be ashamed of yourself!   
  
Authors: Brakish & Rogue31  
  
Disclaimer: Another thing should know. We sure as hell don't own them. All though it would be nice if we did.   
  
  
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X-Duds  
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Chapter 5: The Continued Saga of the Evan Encounter  
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Xavier sat in front of the strange boy. He scratched his head. "So.. um...   
you are invited to go to my school. There, you can get help, and... find   
your talents..." His eyes shifted around the room. "...Yes..."  
  
Evan frowned, crossing his arms. "No!"  
  
Xavier blinked. "Excuse me?"  
  
"No! I'm not going! Billy is scared, and Bob wont go if Billy wont go, and   
Joe... ... being with Joe alone is scary! I'm not going unless all of them   
are coming with me!"  
  
Charles sighed. Great. He had to persuade invisible imaginary kids.   
"A 'hem... Billy, why are you scared?"  
  
Evan cupped his ear as if someone was whispering in it. The boy frowned.   
"Because you're bald."  
  
Xavier grunted. "Evan... er... Billy, I'm old, thus I'm bald."  
  
"He says its contagious, and he loves his hair."  
  
"Tell him he can wear a hat."  
  
Evan turned around. "You can wear a hat, Billy!"  
  
Whispering obviously coming from Evan was heard, soon Evan turned around.   
"All right!" He smiled. "Billy is fine with it."  
  
The trip back was shorter than expected. Time to introduce Evan... Billy,   
Bob, and Joe to the others. "Children!" The Professor called out. The   
teenagers all gathered around, Kurt wearing Jean's sunglasses. "This is   
Evan. I want you all to behave yourselves."  
  
They nodded, Evan joining the group. Kitty looked at him. "Hi! I'm Kitty!"  
  
He looked at her and smiled. "I'm Evan, and these are my friends, Joe, Bob,   
and Billy."  
  
Kitty blinked, looking around. She jumped up and screamed atop her lungs.   
"OH MY GOD!!!! PUT IT AWAY!!!!"  
  
Evan frowned. "Stop it! You're scaring Billy!!"  
  
Kitty's eyes widened. "Are you insane? Bringing the pink polar bear here!!!   
He's going to eat us, and poke us, and drag us down to the fiery pit of   
hell!"  
  
Jean blinked. "The extra 'and' before 'poke us' was not necessary."  
  
Kitty shook Scott furiously. "Quickly now! We must hide in the sanctuary!"   
She darted behind a nearby sofa. Scott hyperventilated. "There's a polar   
bear here?!"  
  
Kitty frowned. "A PINK polar bear! Now hurry! We're all going to die!"  
  
Xavier shook his head. "Children! Children!" He pulled out the sock puppet   
from his pocket. "Now... let's all behave... and go to your chambers."  
  
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Next chapter the much anticipated chapter. Yeh! The Rogue Encounter.   
  
Rogue: Paranoid around people (to extreme) doesn't like being touched. Yes, yes we know (obvious!) but hey it just had to be done! 


	7. Chapter 6: The Rogue Encounter

Summary: Blah, blah…who knows by now.   
  
Authors: Being as that our other sides take over while writing this…no Brakish and Rogue31 still get the credit.   
  
Disclaimer: Maybe one day we'll own em' but when that day comes we'll own BUNNIES, magic beans, little green men, and computers that weren't be pieces of SHI…CRAP!!  
  
  
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X-DUDS  
  
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Chapter 6: The Rogue Encounter  
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"NO! Don't touch me!" she demanded. In her bed, Rogue thrashed screaming at the top of her lungs. When finally she awoke, sweat covering her and the sheets. After several quick breaths she began to relax. Her door opened and light poured in.   
  
"Are you okay?" Irene asked, stepping inside.   
  
Rogue shivered a moment then answered, "I just had a nightmare is all."  
  
"Oh. Well, what was it about?" asked Irene, sitting beside her, placing an arm on her shoulders.   
  
"I…I," she started. Then the nightmare returned. People were everywhere staring at her, touching her. She could still feel the closeness of people and she shivered. "I don't remember,", she lied, not wanting to talk about it.   
  
"Okay, goodnight then," Irene said and left.   
  
Rogue frantically brushed the feeling of Irene's arm off her shoulders. The closeness and the touching and…and Rogue huddled up in her blanket. And soon feel asleep.  
  
  
  
"Ah yes, another student another check in the mail. Don't you just love it Ororo?" Xavier pondered. Inside the X-Jet, Xavier in the front and Ororo behind him. She didn't answer, at first.  
  
"Ororo," Xavier spoke, looking at her. Her breathing was short and fast as she stared out the window curled up in her seat.  
  
Xavier shrugged it off as they reached Mississippi.   
  
  
  
"Breakfast is ready," Irene hollered up the stairs.   
  
Rogue awoke. Her eyes snapped open. "Get away!" she screamed to no one. Looking around to make sure nobody was watching and then she changed. Heading down for breakfast she past a nearby picture. Momentarily touching her. She froze and screamed running back to her room and hid under the bed.  
  
  
  
"I think this is it," Xavier said, as they approached the front door.   
  
Ororo followed close behind. Taking quick glances in all directions. Xavier rang the doorbell.   
  
  
Irene heard the doorbell ring and opened the front door to find a bald guy in a wheel chair and a tall woman with white hair. "Can I help you," she asked.  
  
"Yes, I am Professor Charles Xavier and this is my assistant Dr. Ororo Munroe. We've heard that your daughter has a special condition," Xavier said, with a smile.   
  
"She's not my daughter, I adopted her about a year ago and she has…a problem with people and people touching her. I've been trying to help her with it but nothing seems to work," Irene stated, gesturing the two to come in.  
  
"Thank you," Xavier said. Ororo merely nodded in thanks.  
  
"So where is she?" Xavier asked.   
  
"She's upstairs in her room," Irene answered.  
  
Xavier wheeled towards the stairs. He started to climb the stairs dragging his wheelchair behind him.  
  
"Ah," he said in discomfort.  
  
"Do you want me to help you?" Irene asked.  
  
"Do I look like I need help?" Xavier yelled, climbing more stairs.  
  
"Well," Irene began.  
  
"No! I don't," he said, climbing higher.  
  
He fell to the bottom of the stairs, crying out in agony. "Here just let me," Irene started.  
  
"Just back off! It's not like I'm handicapped or something," Xavier said, reaching the top.  
  
  
Rogue hid under her bed. Peering out every now and then. Her door opened and a man in a wheel chair strolled in. He looked around. Seeing her peek from beneath the bed he smiled and acted as though he didn't see her.   
  
"Hello?" he asked, wheeling around the room. Then stopped when he was by the bed.  
  
Rogue was quiet. Making sure he didn't know where she was.   
  
"BOO!" Xavier yelled, as his head appeared in front of her.  
  
She screamed and scrambled out from beneath the bed. She ran screaming out of her room and down the stairs. He laughed as he followed behind her down the stairs.   
  
  
"Well it was nice meeting you Irene and I'll send you my address later," Xavier said, guiding Rogue out to the X-Jet.   
  
"Goodbye," Irene said, waving to Rogue as she left.   
  
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Considering the fact that Rogue is super hard to bash we had to improvise bashing more bashable characters. *Sorry. Next chapter will hopefully be up sooner then later. No more excuses!!  
  
Next chapter 7: Inside the Institute  
  
Reviews, love em', need em', apperciate em'. Have a nice day!! 


	8. Chapter 7: Inside the Institute

Summary: At this point we're both not sure what it is. Maybe you know. Well, do you know?!?   
  
Authors: Brakish & Rogue31  
  
Acknowledgements: This chapter goes out to our faithful reviewers klucky, me and Vampyre. Thanks!! And all the other reviewers that have reviewed.  
  
Disclaimer: We don't make any profits from this so how could we own them.  
  
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X-Duds  
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Chapter 7: Inside the Institute   
  
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Bang, bang! Evan snapped awake. Then fell back onto his pile of hay, which was explained to being his bed. Other students or inmates were rather jealous at the fact he was allowed a hay bed.  
  
Only the paying inmates got little hay beds.   
  
"Billy! Stop making so much noise," Evan groaned trying to go back to sleep. The sound repeated itself even louder this time. "For crying out loud Billy," he started getting up about to talk to his 'cellmate' when someone was peering through his door at him.  
  
"Uh…hi?" he gulped.  
  
The man sniffed the air and suddenly hollered, trying to break into the cell.  
  
Evan screamed and moved farther back to the corner.   
  
"No! Bad Logan! No tormenting the prisone…er…uh students. Well not yet at least," Xavier said, zapping Logan with the cattle prod.   
  
Logan hobble away.   
  
"Breakfast," Xavier said then continued down the hall.  
  
  
Rogue awoke. "No! Get away!" she yelled her nightmare away. She lie next to the door, unaware of the fact, at least a little too late.   
  
A hand grabbed her from behind and started growling at her. Somehow she managed to break away from the grip and moved to the corner screaming brushing her clothes off. "Ahh! Don't touch me! Stop! Stop touching me!" Still frantically brushing the thought of someone touching her.  
  
ZAP! Then some sort of yipe filled the hallway. "Heel! Damn…" Xavier was interrupted by the continuous out cries of Rogue. "Hey!" he yelled. But it was no use.  
  
He threw a conveniently placed rock at her. A direct hit she fell to the ground and stopped yelling. "Shut up!" Xavier said, "Breakfast is ready." Then moved onto the next student.  
  
  
The six of them occupied the kitchen area. Food was slapped onto the plates. Once they were ready to eat Kitty dived into the room. Looking around she breathed a sigh of relief. "Jeepers, that was close," she said getting up and taking an empty seat where a plate of grub was.   
  
"The word 'Jeepers' is a line from Scooby Doo that the character Velma is most famous for. Therefore in the event in you using that word might bring up some copy right laws and…" Jean was cut off by Kitty flipping out of the chair.  
  
"BEHIND YOU!" Kitty said, peeking over the chair.   
  
"You really don't expect me to fall for you stupid insecurities about a pink polar bear," Jean said.  
  
Behind her she heard a low growl. She laughed quietly, thinking it was her own imagination. When she turned there the pink polar bear was.  
  
"AHHH!" Jean and Kitty screamed running into each other as they made a mad dash for their cells.  
  
The others looked on in horror. But then Xavier came in behind the polar bear laughing. He tugged at the polar bears head and it came off. There Logan stood, growling occasionally. "I've had this costume for year's and I never knew what to do with it until now," Xavier said, leading Logan back to his cell by carrying a piece of bacon in front of him.   
  
The others sat there, shocked.  
  
  
Evan smiled, changing the mood. "So, breakfast is here? That's great!  
Bob loves breakfast! He'll have pancakes and toast, and Billy wants  
cereal, and..." He trailed off, looking at an incoming german boy.  
  
Once Kurt had taken a seat next to Scott he blinked, giving out a terrified scream. "HOLY CRAP DOES HE SEE ME?!" Next to him, Scott fell over onto Kurt's lap, causing the two boys to fall to the ground. Evan gasped. "Be careful! You almost fell on Joe!!!"  
  
Kurt's lovely glasses fell to the ground, and he began reaching for  
them. "My glasses! My glasses! People will SEE me without my  
glasses!!!"  
  
"People can see you any way, Kurt," Scott corrected. Several heads looked at Scott, suspiciously.   
  
"I thought you were blind?" Ororo questioned.   
  
All eyes gazed at him. He began to sweat. "I…I…uh Jean told me," he said.  
  
Still a bit hesitant about his answer the others decided to let it go. Still in a frantic search of his glasses Kurt bumped into Rogue. She started screaming hysterically and began running around the kitchen.  
  
"Look out! Rogue you just knocked over Bob!" Evan stated, helping Bob up.  
  
After hearing that, Rogue screamed even louder since she touched someone else. Regardless of the fact the person was imaginary.  
  
An air horn erupted in the doorway as Xavier wheeled in. "Now I hate to do this so early in the morning, but…" he reached into his pocket. Scott and Ororo were already halfway out of the kitchen by then.   
  
Immediately after the dreaded sock puppet showed its... sock-puppety face,   
Kitty jumped out of her seat. "You can break our spirits, but you'll never   
get me!!!" She lunged at Xavier's sock-covered hand and bit it furiously.   
Everyone gasped, looking at Kitty.  
  
She let go of the Professor's hand several moments later and laughed   
hysterically... soon after, her laughter faded. "W-Where did the fuzzy   
serpent of DOOM go?" She blinked mindlessly, and noticed she had bitten the   
Professor's hand. She "eep"ed and ran out for dear life. The room was full   
of silence. A glint of fury showed upon the Professor's face, and he ran   
after Kitty waving the sock puppet in the air. Jean, Rogue, and Kurt soon   
evacuated to their cells.  
  
Evan sat there eating innocently at the breakfast table, humming a song in   
his head happily. He looked next to him. "Isn't breakfast the best time of   
the day, Billy?"  
  
  
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We're finished…with this chapter.   
  
Next chapter, Chapter 8: Afternoon Activities 


	9. Chapter 8: Afternoon Activities

Summary: Summary? What summary?  
  
Authors: Brakish & Rogue31   
  
Disclaimer: We'd like to own em' but we don't, like many other things.  
  
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X-Duds  
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Chapter 8: Afternoon Activities  
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An afternoon in the Xavier Institute. Kitty sat in the living room with   
Evan, Ororo, and Rogue, flipping channels on the television. Evan sat there   
happily on the sofa with action figures he apparently brought to the school.   
"Put it to the Candy Bar Squad! Candy Bar Squad! We love the candy bars!"  
  
Rogue sat on the far edge of the sofa. "Yeah right! We're not watching   
that!"  
  
Evan frowned, "B-But... if Joe doesn't see the Candy Bar Squad every day, he   
goes on a furious rampage!" He fell over as if someone jumped on him. He   
patted an invisible friend. "It's ok, Billy... Joe hasn't lost it yet."  
  
Rogue blinked, her eyes widened. "Uh... where exactly ARE your friends   
here...?"  
  
Evan snickered. "Oooh! Bob likes you!"  
  
At the moment Rogue screamed and ran out the room. Ororo smiled in   
satisfaction. "Yes! Yes! More air for me!"  
  
Kitty switched the channel to "The Candy Bar Squad" for Evan and his...   
friend's... enjoyment. She watched as the moving candy bars connected to   
make the ultimate candy bar to destroy the evil vegetable monster. Evan's   
eyes widened as he moved closer to the television screen, with his action   
figures and a happy smile on his face.  
  
Kitty gasped. "It's a sign!!" she jumped up, throwing a lamp at the   
television. Kitty cheered in her victory. Evan slowly looked back at Kitty.   
"Why'd you do that?! Bob is crying now!"  
  
Kitty placed her hands on her hips and laughed diabolically. "The panda   
thought it could trick me!"  
  
Ororo blinked. "... Panda?"  
  
Kitty continued her laughing, and suddenly fell off the sofa. Evan gasped.   
"No, Joe!! No rampage!"  
  
Kitty screamed atop her lungs. "Eeeeeeek! The pink polar bear strikes   
again!" She looked at Ororo in caution. "Get as much peanut butter as you can   
get from the house!"  
  
Ororo shrugged and ran into the kitchen, soon returning with peanut butter   
and handing it to Kitty. Kitty squealed and ran behind a chair, soon eating   
the peanut butter. Evan blinked. "Why are you eating peanut butter?"  
  
Kitty laughed. "The polar bear will NEVER suspect the peanut butter!"  
  
Whether it was the nervous feeling around Kitty during her out bursts or just plain fear of what she might do that forced Evan and Ororo to leave the room…rather quickly didn't matter. Away…that's all that was needed. Away from Kitty.   
  
Evan passed Jean in the hall. She scrambled something around before she looked up at Evan. "Hello," she greeted.  
  
"Hi! Bob also says hi. Billy and Joe would say hi too but they went to go get their baseball gloves. We're going to play catch," Evan declared.  
  
"Well then, don't let me keep you waiting," Jean said.  
  
Evan smiled and skipped away. "All clear," she said next to her.  
  
Scott popped his head out of the whole. "So how far are we?" she asked. Held up his spoon, smiling.   
  
"A little further and we'll be out."  
  
"Great! Okay, keep digging while I keep watch."  
  
"Why can't I keep watch and you dig for a change?"  
  
"Because silly, you can't see. It makes perfect sense for you to dig and get all dirty while I stay up here, keeping clean and watching so no one knows of our plan of escape."  
  
"Wow, Jean. You're so smart."  
  
"Yes, well I can't argue with you on that. Now, aren't you suppose to be doing something?"  
  
Scott lowered back into the whole. Hitting his head on the way down.  
  
"It won't be long now," Jean said, "not long at all. Scott will finishing digging the hole all the way outside and I'll be free! Free!" She stood, arms out stretched as she smiled. A figure caught her attention out of the corner of her eye.  
  
Jean slowly turned to find that Rogue had just overheard her conversation. "Free?! Scott's digging an escape hole and we'll be able to leave this place?" Rogue asked, eyes wide in aw.  
  
NO! The rest must not know. Then Xavier will know we've all escaped. They must stay here, for my sake. She thought.  
  
"What? Is that what I said. No, no…you see I was just uh…dreaming, yes dreaming. And I must have dreamt some crazy dream. You know how that goes," Jean lied.  
  
"No, Scott's down there digging an escape route out of this hell whole isn't he, isn't he! Well no lie will stop me from escaping with you. No way," Rogue declared, crossing her arms.  
  
An evil smile crept upon Jean's face, "I'm sorry. Let's hug to make up," she said, inching towards Rogue. Frightened, Rogue screamed and ran out of the room. Laughing, Jean returned to her thoughts of freedom.  
  
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"Billy, stop goofy off catch the ball will you," Evan said. He had just thrown the ball to Billy, who wasn't paying attention and missed the ball. "Okay, throw it back," Evan said, "Nice throw. Here catch Joe." The imaginary ball soared and found its way to Joe.  
  
Kurt observed Evan from the window. Evan was running around the yard, acting as though he were catching something and then throwing it back. Kurt couldn't help but be somewhat amused by the show of stupidity.  
  
Then Evan turned, LOOKING AT HIM. Eyes wide Kurt glanced around, hoping he was looking at someone else. There wasn't anyone else around. Then Evan waved at Kurt. He couldn't take it, he turned and ran but not without bumping into the already screaming and running for her life, Rogue.   
  
They collided and fell to the ground. Rogue looked at Kurt, Kurt had made contact with Rogue when running into her, all that had just happened sank in. After a moment of silent shock they both got up and ran, screaming through the halls.   
  
  
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"What a lovely day. Tra-le-la," Xavier said, spinning his wheel chair, giggling.  
  
Then out of nowhere screaming came and it got closer until, Bam! Xavier was thrown from his wheelchair when he looked up he saw Kitty. "What the hell are you doing?" he demanded.  
  
Kitty giggled then answered, "Well Kurt and Rogue were running around screaming I thought that's what everyone else was doing, plus it really scares the little blue bunny."  
  
"The…little…blue…bunny?" Xavier said, eyeing her.  
  
Nodding her head excitedly she smiled. "LOOK OUT BEHIND YOU!" he yelled.   
  
Kitty turned and screamed. "NO! My un-penetrate-able peanut butter force field has been breached! Quick, we must find the jelly!" she declared, grabbing and shaking Xavier.   
  
"In the cell below. It's mark Logan's Cell," he said.  
  
Kitty nodded and got up. "I must go. To Logan's Cell," she said and ran downstairs.  
  
Xavier waited, waited and waited. A loud scream was heard followed by a roar. He laughed.   
  
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Okay sorry for the MAJOR delay folks. I've been stumped on brilliant ideas and inspiration and so has Brakish. Hoping this speed bump will help clear the air for the next chapter.   
  
Chapter 9:The Change 


	10. Chapter 9: The Change

Summary: One of those questions that don't have an answer.  
  
Disclaimer: Don't own em' though we do spend hours a day wishing we did!  
  
Authors: Brakish & Rogue31  
  
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X-Duds  
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Chapter 9: The 'Change'  
  
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Through the halls she went, nothing was stopping Rogue from screaming her  
lungs out. Then suddenly she ran into Ororo. The physical contact was   
enough to send her into another round of screaming through the halls. "Wait,"   
Ororo said.  
  
Stunned, Rogue did as she was told. "Uh…why?" Rogue asked.  
  
"You see, you're not funny. Nobody is laughing at what you're doing. You're  
dropping our ratings, the reviewers don't like you, Brakish isn't sure what  
to do with you and I'm sure that Rogue31 feels incredibly stupid for making  
you act this way."  
  
Ororo turned and looked off the computer screen at Rogue31, Rogue did the  
same. A smile appeared on Rogue31's face and she nodded. "I don't know what  
I was thinking," Rogue31 said.  
  
"They're changing your, how shall I say, problem, yes, problem will do. They don't know to what but your problem is being changed," Ororo said.  
  
"No, no I'll be good. Just give me another chance. I'll be funny, people  
will laugh," Rogue pleaded  
  
"I'm sorry Rogue," Brakish and Rogue31 said together.  
  
  
  
Brakish's eyes widened, thinking of an extraordinary idea. . . one that sounded good, at the moment anyhow. She smirked wickedly. "Ooh! Rogue! You can be a copy cat!"  
  
Rogue's face turned blank. ". . .say what? Isn't that a little childish?"  
  
The un-talented writer whimpered. "B-But!!! You can pretend to have the   
mental illnesses or just weirdness as everyone else at awkward moments!" She gasped in happiness of her idea.   
  
"Like. . . how chaotic would it be if there were two people seeing pink   
polar bears or even someone else seeing Joe and Bob?"  
  
"And Billy. . . don't forget him." She muttered.  
  
Brakish smiled. "See?! You'll do fine! What do ya think, Rogue31?"  
  
Rogue31 clears throat, "Uh...YEAH! I mean people will totally laugh and I'm laughing ha ha ha, see it's funny!"   
  
Rogue looked from Brakish to Rogue31 a smile covered her face. "Okay!" she said cheerfully. Rogue looked around the room, since Brakish and Rogue31 'disappeared,' hoping, maybe, someday to reappear and destroy the evilness of this corrupt story. But until then this will have to do.   
  
Ororo started her little thing. "Too many people…must rejuvenate air that was last."  
  
Rogue looked at her, then back at the computer screen. Brakish and Rogue31 nodded, evilly. Taking deep breathes she looked at Ororo. "Must rejuvenate air that was lost."  
  
Ororo gasped. "You mustn't talk. You're wasting the air."  
  
Wide eyed, Rogue repeated the line.   
  
Ororo stopped and took a peek at the computer screen. Brakish and Rogue31 were already laughing at their new found chaos that was about to erupt. "I hate you," was all Ororo could say before she took off down the hall, Rogue on her heels.   
  
  
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This chapter tops the weirdness scale.   
  
Chapter 10: *Title Under Construction* 


	11. Chapter 10: Another Happy Day

Summary: *scratches head* I don't know! *runs out of room, screaming*  
  
Authors: Brakish and Rogue31  
  
Disclaimer: Knowing how difficult this may seem we'll break the news to you slowly. We don't own the characters, Marvel does. We don't make any profits from this. Find a tissue and grab a brown paper bag for hyperventilating issues and read on.  
  
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X-Duds  
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Chapter 10: Another Happy Day  
  
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After the routine 'get-up' all of the "students" made their way to the kitchen. Kurt stood trembling in the corner, looking at Rogue with fearful eyes. Out of nowhere, Rogue began trembling in her chair. Kitty rose an eyebrow at her, Rogue copying that action along with the trembling.   
  
The morning was full of strange looks. Jean looked at Kitty to see her bruised face and her clothes tattered. She cleared her throat, while organizing the utensils on the table. "Kitty, may I ask why your clothes are. . . ripped?"   
  
Kitty giggled. "I had the BEST sleep of my night!"   
  
The Professor blinked. Did she say what he thought she said?   
  
"Yeah! I went to Logan's Cell, and he saved me from the evil blue bunny!" She leaned towards Jean, whispering. "The pink polar bear's associate, dont'cha know." She sat straight and looked at the ceiling. "Of course, he had to make the barrier of screams and yells, but that's only necessary."   
  
Jean nudged towards Scott and stood up. "First off, scream and yell are the   
same word. . ."   
  
Scott rose a finger. "What do you mean barrier of-"   
  
Right there a scream left from Kitty's lips. Charles eyed her. He had to find a different mode of torture. . . err. . . therapy for their dear Kitty. His evil smile reached his ears with some of his ideas. Evan frowned.   
  
"Hey! No fair! Me and my posy don't like to be ignored!"   
  
And, of course, they went on as if he had said nothing. Evan stood up. "It's ok, Billy. They say nothing because they love you too."   
  
Almost immediately, Kurt fell onto the ground squirming and screaming.   
  
"Nooooooo! I can't see 'em but I know he's there!" He scolded the ceiling. "OH WHEN WILL THE MADNESS STOP?!"   
  
Evan laughed, pulling the imaginary person away from Kurt. "Now, now, Billy. No need to get over-affectionate."  
  
Xavier watched the exchange. Though he was in no mood to torment the children himself, for a change, he decided to end the obnoxious troubles of the teens.   
  
He looked at Kitty, very casually. "Look out! The Pink Polar Bear!"  
  
Diving across the room, Kitty tackled Evan, while mimicking her actions, Rogue landed on top of Kurt.  
  
Once he landed, Kurt freaked out from being touched and the center of attention because all on were in his locked on him…or Evan. But that didn't matter, if they weren't looking at him now, then they sure were 'thinking' about looking at him. Of course, like any other time, this caused Kurt to run, hysterically out of the room.   
  
"Whew, that was close. You don't know how lucky you are that I just saved you're life, Evan," Kitty said, getting up and brushing herself off.  
  
Jean looked at Kitty, "You used the word 'you're' instead of 'your'. In the case you were using, 'your' would be correct, since 'you're' is used when saying 'you are'," Jean corrected.  
  
"Uh, I said that. That was a spelling mistake on the writer's part," Kitty corrected.  
  
Stunned, Jean's mouth lay hung wide open. "Are you correcting, me! You're correcting me? I…I, you can't do that! She can't do that," Jean demanded, stomping her foot on the ground, looking at the other students. "I'm the one who corrects you simpletons! Not the other way around. You are the ones that need to be corrected and corrected I shall correct you," she looked down upon the others.  
  
"That last phrase after and was mixed it should be something more like 'and corrected you shall be," Scott said.  
  
"Shut up, Scott," Jean ordered. Like he always did Scott did as he was told.   
  
"I guess you're not 'Miss Perfect' after all," Kitty said.  
  
"I guess you're not 'Miss Perfect' after all," Rogue repeated.  
  
Jean left the room, feet stomping the ground as she left. Rogue followed behind, leaving in the same fashion.  
  
"Is it cold in here or is it just me?" Bobby asked, rubbing his arms. All eyes were directed to him. "What? You act like I haven't been here the whole time!"  
  
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Special thanks and happy little green men goes out to 'The Scribe'. Though we were going to do something else with Bobby your idea was just too good to pass up.   
  
Next Chapter: The Great Escape 


	12. Chapter 11: The Great Escape

Disclaimer: Don't own em', blah, blah, blah!  
  
Authors: Brakish and Rogue31  
  
  
  
  
~~~ X-Duds ~~~  
  
  
~~~Chapter 11 : The Great Escape~~~  
  
  
  
The beautiful afternoon sun was high in the sky. The soft breeze lightly tickled the skin of those outside enjoying the day. "Such a perfect day," Xavier said aloud, wheeling down the driveway. He eagerly awaited today's mail, well he eagerly awaited the mail everyday.   
  
Opening the mailbox he couldn't help but smile, sinisterly, as he pulled out several stuffed envelopes. "Such a perfect day indeed," he commented, holding the smaller envelopes up to the light, so he could see its contents.  
  
  
Jean and Scott watched the typical daily mail pickup by Xavier. The evil smiles, the spinning of the wheelchair, the giggle fits, and who could forget the hugging of the envelopes.   
  
"Now's our chance, Scott," Jean said, pulling Scott towards their tunnel. "Well?" Jean asked, once they were there.   
  
"What?" Scott asked, standing there.   
  
"Aren't you going to move the objects blocking the tunnel?" Jean asked.   
  
"But, but I, I can't see," Scott reminded.   
  
"Fine! I'll do it. I could very well stub my toe or get a blister from moving these things, but that's okay because you can't see. It's fine, I'll just do all the physical labor," Jean pouted.  
  
Scott narrowed his eyebrows. "No! That's okay, I'll do it for you, Jean. I wouldn't want you to get hurt."   
  
He stumbled over the objects and began moving the chair, the table, the couch, the refrigerator, the sofa, the television, and finally the kitchen sink. He felt around and found the piece of carpet that covered the hole.   
  
"Quick! Put everything back, Xavier is coming!" Jean said, looking out the window.   
  
Scott fumbled everything back, precisely where it had been.   
  
The door opened and sure enough Xavier wheeled in. He head up the stairs to his study. The two stood there and waited. Not too long they heard the door close and lock.   
  
"Whew! That was close! Okay, move everything again," she ordered.   
  
Panting, Scott clutched his hands on his knees. "What are you doing? Move everything so we can go!" Jean said.  
  
Slowly he began hauling the contents away from the tunnel. "Oh drad! I forgot my purse," Jean said and left to retrieve it.   
  
Heaving, Scott struggled for breath. Then replaced everything so no one might come across this mess and ruin their escape from the mansion.  
  
About five hours later Jean appeared. "Okay read?" Scott?" she kicked the sleeping boy awake, "Are we going?" she asked.  
  
"Uh, where have you been?" he asked, getting up.   
  
"Well, I had to freshen up and eat. Do you think I'd leave here on an empty stomach? Well, are you ready?"   
  
"But, I, uh, I didn't have anything to eat yet," he declared.   
  
"Oh don't be silly. We'll have plenty to eat once we get out of here," she said.  
  
"Oh, I, alright." Scott again moved everything from its place, yet again. Once everything was cleared Jean smiled.  
  
"Could you help me down?" she asked, batting her eyelashes. Scott helped her down. Once she was down her smile turned to a frown. "EW! You expect ME to go down in that DIRTY hole?" she said, outraged.  
  
"Well, I, uh, I thought, this was your idea," he said.   
  
"It wasn't my idea to get all dirty. I expected you to have cleaned this filth and had everything ready. Now we have to wait until this dirty tunnel is clean. So, Scott, clean it!"   
  
Before he could say anything a group of the other students approached them.  
  
Kitty blinked, staring at the hole in the ground. "Wow... what's that?"  
  
Jean flicked her hair back. "Our way out of here."  
  
Evan folded his arms. "It's too messy to go that way... and you're messing up the nice old professor's floor! What would your mother think?"  
  
Kitty and Rogue looked at the boy, Jean reacting first by slapping Evan aside the head. "We're leaving, and we're doing it THIS way? Haven't you figured it out yet? I'm a genius!"  
  
Rogue cleared her throat, keeping her distance from the other students. "Can't we just... ya know... hide the sock puppet?"  
  
Jean glared at the girl. "You DARE think your idea is better than MINE?"  
  
Rogue rolled her eyes, flicking back her short hair in the same fashion Jean flicked back her hair earlier. "Uh... yeah?"  
  
Kitty jumped up and down. "Wee! Yay! So we liberate the tortured sock soul from the Professor?" She squealed. " About damn time too! I think that sock has been captured long enough, and it's infuriating the local butter flubbies!"   
  
Jean blinked. "Don't you mean butter flies?"  
  
Kitty growled at Jean, her eyes turning red and demonic. "Get off my back, woman!!!"  
  
Rogue, all of a sudden, became perky and grabbed Kitty's hands. "TO THE SOCK PUPPET!!!"  
  
Evan nudged to his 'friends' and followed the two girls as they skipped away.  
  
Jean sighed. "Well... that was an annoying interruption..." She looked back at the hole. "Cleaned it yet?"  
  
The sounds of Scott dusting and sneezing was all that was heard. Jean grumped. "You better not be getting your germs in there!"  
  
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^  
  
Well the two of us got inspired to write a different ending then we had planned. Be patient and tune in next time for…  
  
Chapter 12: The End 


	13. Chapter 12: The End

Disclaimer: All previous disclaimers apply.   
  
Authors: Brakish & Rogue31  
  
Alas, the ending! The two of us sort of took a holiday break from this story, but it's all right we've updated it for everyone anticipating this story. And here it is…  
  
Thanks for all the reviews!!  
  
  
CAUTION!: What you are about to read is a story with totally odd circumstances. To read any further you must have an open mind to off the wall weirdness.  
  
  
~~~X-Duds~~~  
  
Chapter 12: The End  
  
  
  
Xavier sat in his study. All of the envelopes had been opened. He had neatly separated the cash from the checks.   
  
Sighing at the checks as they kept him away from the green papers he so greedily loved. But on a happier note the checks were worth a lot more money then the cash he received. He grabbed some bills and waved them in his face. 'Oh, the wonderful smell of bills,' he thought to himself. Inhaling the smell.   
  
Just then he heard a noise from outside his study. "Medalling children," he said, going to the door.   
  
Before he could react the door flew open and his 'students' stepped into his study. "How dare you enter my study!" he declared, looking at the determined features of them all.   
  
Kitty pouted, her hands folded across her chest, and her head soon hanging   
back. "YOUR EVIL SHALL NO LONGER HOLD POSESSION OF THE PUPPET IN DISTRESS!"  
  
The Professor rose and eyebrow, wheeling back with the mail in his hands. "I   
believe it's time for you to return to your cells..."  
  
At that moment, Rogue (copying the odd persona of Kitty) ran to the hall   
giggling hysterically. The other patients watched as she left. Jean coughed,   
blinking in puzzlement. "Well, this was HER plan, wasn't it?"  
  
Charles reached into his pocket, soon raising the sock puppet up high in the   
air. "You have been here long enough! Me, AND Mr. Sock agree that it's your   
time to go!"  
  
With that, he began chasing the students as well as an old man in a   
wheelchair could possibly do. Jean, ran screaming. Scott, ran into a wall.   
Evan, hid under the sofa in the study with his little invisible friends.   
Kitty, began running around screaming "THE SOUTH SHALL RISE AGAIN!"  
  
Xavier, laughing diabolically circled the room... as if aimlessly chasing an   
invisible man. Soon, a small little bashful german boy jumped from under the   
study's desk and onto the professor's wheelchair, slapping his hands over   
the old man's eyes.  
  
With that, the professor stopped his crazy rage-like attack as Kurt spoke in   
a stutter. "G-Guess who?!"  
  
Charles thought quickly. "Señor Poncho?"  
  
"... nope!"  
  
"Sporky?"  
  
"Nuh uh..."  
  
As the professor continued to guess, Rogue ran back in... an enraged psycho   
patient, also known as Logan chasing her and foaming at the mouth.  
  
From the high shrills of all the students came a voice. "I have the instrument that will Liberate the sock puppet!" the voice rang.  
  
Everyone seized what they were doing and turned to see Rogue in the doorway with a spatula in her hand.   
  
Dumbfounded, Scott stopped his continuous wall meets head scenario and listened.   
  
"Of course! The SPATULA! With its' powers, the wheeler of the sock puppet is useless!" Kitty exclaimed, adding, "No punt intended with the wheeler bit."  
  
"That's quite all right," Xavier said.  
  
"We have our spatula's," Evan said, acknowledging his 'friends'.  
  
Seemingly, out of nowhere, all the students were holding spatula's that a second ago they didn't even know what the instrument was to destroy the sock puppet's evilness was.   
  
"Ooh! The power of the spatula," Scott said in awe.  
  
Xavier looked around at everyone. A trickle of sweat fell from his bald head. "You promised me that you'd never reveal my secret!" he shouted at the sock puppet. Then with his unoccupied hand, he began strangling the sock puppet.   
  
"We must liberate the evil!"  
  
"The sock puppet must be freed!"  
  
"Free its' tortured soul from the madness!"  
  
"Infuriated the local butter flubbies!"   
  
The students shouted. Then began whacking Xavier with their spatula's.   
  
"Aah! NO…stop…OU! Please…aah!" he cried out, as the slaps of the spatula's struck his bald head.  
  
"STOP!" he shrieked. And for some odd reason they did.  
  
The professor blinked, gulping slowly as not to set off any of his students   
to hit him with another spatula... and to avoid setting off the odd wild   
man, who had a spatula as well (which was currently ripping apart the study)  
  
He quickly wheeled back to the desk in the middle of the study and began   
laughing an evil laugh. He pulled a small remote control from inside one of   
the drawers and cackled. "Now I shall leave, WITH your money! BWAHHAHA!"  
  
He pressed one of the buttons, still with an insane laugh. The students   
cringed... but... nothing happened.  
  
Kurt blinked, hiding from the other children's sights, and looked around.   
"What was THAT supposed to do...?"  
  
Evan ran to a nearby window and pointed towards the outside. He laughed,   
smiling a childish smile. "It's time for the sprinklers! Finally! Joe   
thought it was about time to water that grass!"  
  
Jean looked out, soon sighing. "Evan... that's insect repellent."  
  
His eyes widened. "B-But... the cute little bugs!"  
  
Kitty raised her arms in the air, along with Rogue. "NOOOOO!" Kitty glared   
towards the bald man with demonic fire in her eyes. "You fight well, old   
wheelchair man! But I see your murder of the grasshoppers of truth and raise   
you THIS!" at that moment she reached into her pocket, pulling out a little   
stuffed animal of a pig.  
  
With that, she swung back. "Here's the hokey pokey!" The stuffed animal   
flew, fast and with fury.  
  
Missing horribly, she hit Scott on the back of the head... he soon falling   
to the ground, whimpering "I've been pigged!"  
  
The professor rubbed his temples. "For the love of..." soon enough, his   
eeevil personality had returned. "HAHAHAHA! NOW I HAVE THE RIGHT BUTTON!"  
  
He pressed another one from the remote control... a disco ball lowering from   
the ceiling and strobe lights shooting as well as techno music.  
  
The professor cursed under his breath, as the students danced.  
  
"Stop this madness! You must desist immediately!" Xavier declared. He returned to his desk and pulled out another control. "Dance to this!" he said, pressing the button.   
  
The students stopped dancing as the sprinkling system went off. "Oh no! We must evacuate! The old wheelchair sock puppet wheeler person has called upon the burning rain of death!" Kitty shrieked.  
  
"My face! My Beautiful FACE!" Jean shouted, as her hands covered her face from any other misfortune.  
  
"NO!" Evan shriek. He bent down to what people presumed was one of his 'friends'. "He's melting! Melting. Oh what a world!… You killed Bob!"   
  
Since no one was listening to him, like always, the students went on with the trouble at hand.  
  
Kurt, from his hiding place, jumped onto Xavier's wheelchair. "What's this button do?" he asked pressing a button.  
  
Suddenly, the sprinklers turned off but a strange greenish gas spread   
through the room. Charles, knowing what the green gas was shoved Kurt out of   
his wheelchair and strolled out of the room. He closed the doors and looked   
at the children through a window on one of the doors.  
  
"AHAHAHAHHAHAHA!" He lifted Mr. Sock puppet up in victory... however,   
getting too excited and falling off his wheelchair.  
  
Ororo, from the hall, looked at the fallen old man and rose an eyebrow in   
curiosity. Xavier, from the floor looked at her... and for no apparent   
reason, opened a door, and shoved her in. He cackled evilly, closing the   
door and locking it... falling down again.  
  
Scott coughed, covering his mouth. "What's THAT?"  
  
Evan fanned his face. "Billy says, whoever smelt it dealt it."  
  
The 'students' soon dropped to the floor like flies, the radioactive gas of   
which Kurt had ignited bringing affect onto them.  
  
Xavier patted his pocket where he had put the money…the money? It was gone. He frantically searched his surroundings for it. There, back in his study. He pressed his face against the glass. Whimpering, he wheeled back inside to fetch his precious. "Those thieves, they stole my Precious and we want it back!" he said, crawling into the study.   
  
*Cough…cough. In his hands he held the money. The feel of it, the smell, the taste…the taste? Yes, the taste of it! "My Precious!!" Xavier dashed out of the study. slapping the gasping students away with his cattle prod.  
  
From outside the study, and in the hall, the professor had already made his   
way back onto the wheelchair and strolled happily down the hall, whistling.   
Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out envelopes which contained the lovely   
'students' money within. He smirked evilly. "Daddy's gonna get himself a new   
pair of oven mitts."  
  
He touched his bald head, and gasped in surprise. "W-What's the meaning of   
THIS?" he pulled both his hands up and felt his head. His eyes enlarged.   
"The... radiation! It... MADE ME BALD... ER!"  
  
Insanely, he wheeled up and down the halls. Screaming about the side effect of the radiation that had made him bald. Though, in reality, he had already been bald. But that secret was kept from him…just for the moment.  
  
The green gas disappeared from the room. Some of the students convulsed on the floor while others coughed.   
  
Kitty looked around. "Like, that was so gross!" she declared. Scott crawled towards her.   
  
"Red! All I can see is red! The horror! The pain!" he said, grabbing Kitty's leg.  
  
"Like, you couldn't see before," she corrected, trying to shake him off. Mysteriously, her leg phased through his hand and she was free from his grasp.  
  
"Look Billy and Joe, I think they're spikes!" he said, showing his friends the spikes coming out from different parts of his body. "Maybe I'm going through my second puberty…or my first!" Evan guessed. Fortunately, for him, no one was around to hear his idiotic statement.  
  
Kurt looked out the window and saw his reflection. "Eep!" he shrieked, hiding from the blue demon reflection in the window. Then he BAMFED out of the room.  
  
Jean blinked. "Well.. what happened to HIM?" She pointed at the once wild   
man that somehow became poised. Logan looked at her. "What are YOU looking   
at?" He wiped off the remaining foam from his mouth.  
  
Ororo looked out the hall and tilted her head. "That 'Kurt' boy went to the   
other side..."  
  
Kitty ran to the door with Evan. Evan jokingly pressed her face against the   
window on one of the doors and called to the boy on the other side.   
"Kuuuurt! Open the dooooor!"  
  
The blue elf german boy looked back, laughing slightly at Kitty's pressed   
face. Her eyes widened and she suddenly sunk through the door and began   
chasing him down the hall screaming random gibberish.  
  
The students returned to the study so they could wait for the explanation of what happened be told. With all the new wonders occurring the students were simply in awe, it usually never took much.   
  
Jean could move things with her mind and read others thoughts. Ororo could control the weather. And the rest, well, you might guess.  
  
Suddenly Xavier strolled in. The students awaited the evil man to abuse them, like he always did, but none were harmed…yet.   
  
"I believe the radiation we were exposed to turned us all into mutants and our characteristics are molding into the 'normal' X-Men's. Well, X-Men Evolution," Xavier explained.  
  
"Oh!" They all said in unison.   
  
After his speech the X-Men started acting like the Evolution characters on Saturday mornings on WB.  
  
And they lived happily ever after! If WB signs for another season.  
  
  
THE END!!!!!!!!   
  
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^  
  
We hoped you enjoyed this fic! It was a total blast writing and hearing the reviews and ideas from you readers.  
  
-Brakish and Rogue31 


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